My Life with Monster Girls
by CymrianDragul
Summary: Chris is your basic guy. Work, cleaning, bills. The usual. But then his life changes when he's chosen as a host family for monsters.
1. Opening

It was another typical day, or at least as typical as my days go lately. I got up, went to work, picked up the groceries, and went home. You know, mundane everyday things. But that's where my "normal" life ends. All it takes is one step through the door before I feel the weight on my back.

"Oi, did'ja get the snacks I wanted? Or did'ja bloody forget again?" Yeah, that's what I deal with. But maybe I'm getting ahead of myself. Name's Chris. For about a year or so, I lived in a small apartment by myself. That is, until the Interspecies Cultural Exchange Act came about. It started in Japan, but quickly passed in other countries, like England and the US. Which would explain how an American guy like me got moved into a big house with an English spider.

Anyway, it all started coming home from work one morning. As I went to open my door, I felt someone tap me on the shoulder. Turning around, I saw some weird guy I've never seen before. He looked like he could be a body builder if it wasn't for the suit. "Can I help you, by any chance?"

"Yes, I believe you can. My name is Agent Froth. I'm here on government business. You've been selected to be a host family for a liminal through the Interspecies Cultral Exchange Act. I have movers parked and ready to move you into a more...suitable...location."

Well, color me intrigued. "Well, Agent Froth, if I may ask, why do your knuckles have 'Adder' tattooed across them?

"Adder Froth. That's not important. Do you agree to be apart of the program? Although you really don't have much choice."

Well, that made my decision easy. Next thing I knew, I'm standing in front of a big house and watching Agent Froth open a car door for what I first thought was a small girl, but seeing the extra eyes, legs, and abdomen quickly made me realize was an arachne. At least she was small and cute. Almost like...well, never mind that.

"Oi, mate. Who's this bloody wanker?" Great, getting insulted by a British child. This day can't get better. "I thought I'd be getting someone cool."

Froth sighed. "Cerys, this is your host family. You really should treat him better." Thank you, Agent. "Just because he looks plain doesn't mean you should insult him." I take back my mental thanks with that.

So the spider, or Cerys if the agent was correct, looked me over once. "He'll do for now, I guess."

Of course, all I can do is sigh. At least now I can't confuse her for my Lily. But I push that thought to the back of my mind. First, I need to figure out this situation.

I had to ask, "So what exactly do I need to do? Any special instructions or anything?" Considering I've never had to take care of a girl who's also half spider, I figured it was a good question.

"Just make sure that she doesn't leave without you, and as a precaution, keep her from caffeine." The agent seemed to know what he was talking about. Good for me.

Cerys decided to chime in at that point. "Just make sure you get me the food I like and let me use you for 'hunting practice.'" She had a grin that would look menacing if she didn't look so young.

"So Froth, just so I know and can keep my language PG, exactly how old is she?" Because a guy in his late 20's with a small child/spider would be kind of weird to explain to the neighbors.

"Oh, I didn't tell you earlier?" Froth seemed slightly confused. "She's only a few years younger than you." What?! "She's a small breed, so she naturally looks young."

Oh fun. "So anything else that I might need to know about before this fully happens?" Cerys brushed past me and went inside muttering something about finding a good hiding spot for practice.

Froth thought for a moment. "Only thing is that, as she said, she'll probably use you for pouncing practice. She's a green huntsman, so at least you won't have to worry about webs everywhere. And she knows to keep her poison to herself. So no worries."

No worries. Yeah, right. But the Agent was already getting into his car. "Well, have fun with your new living quarters."

I turned to look at the house again. "At least it's a decent size with a yard. Small miracles, I guess." Well, time to start my new life, I guess.


	2. First week recap

One week later:

It was a pretty uneventful week, all things considered. Other than Cerys pouncing on me to "practice" her hunting when I wasn't looking, or whining about not having enough snacks, it was relatively normal. But one day, after she climbed off my back after a successful "attack,"

"Hey Cerys, I just realized. You wear that same dress all the time, don't you?"

Cerys glared at me slightly. "Why do you want to know? What perverted thoughts are running through your mind?"

Of course she'd jump to that. That's been her default assumption the past week. "Nothing like that. But I'm wondering if you had any other clothes. I talked to Agent Froth the other day, and he told me that if we needed anything, to feel free to charge it to him."

All eight of her eyes lit up hearing that. "You mean...We can go shopping?" And now she's hyper. Great. "Let's go. Let's go. Let's go."

"All right. Since it's nice out, we'll walk to the shops. They're close enough to here." And you can burn up some of that energy that you always seem to have.

A few minutes later, we're outside a shop that also caters to liminals. Next thing I knew, I'm surrounded by clothes of various shades and shapes. And there I was, dressed in jeans and a tshirt.

Cerys pulls a couple of things off of one of the racks. "I'm going to try these on. Don't try to peek at me while I'm changing." Again with that. I shouldn't be surprised.

She goes into one of the changing rooms, and I'm left to stand around looking like a fool, so nothing different from normal there. Then, from the racks to my left, a female voice. An unfortunately familiar female voice.

"Chris? I thought it was you. I haven't seen you since-"

"Hello, Laura. What are you doing here?" I've been trying to avoid you since the lawyers.

"I could ask you the same thing. You're standing around in the girls section. I won't say I blame you if you're not over 'The Incident' yet. I know I'm not." Of course. She's still trying to play therapist. People never change, I guess.

"First, I prefer not to thank about that right now. And second, I'm shopping. That should be obvious."

At that point, Cerys opened the door. "I think this silver one looks good on me. But the magenta one looks good too." Then she realized there was another person standing by me. "What's bloody goin' on here?" It's adorable when she's faced with new things and her accent comes out.

"It's nothing, Cerys. Let's get your clothes and get out of here." I gently start guiding her to the counter. Hopefully we can leave before-

"Chris? That spider girl...She kind of reminds me of Lily..." Oh no. There it is.

"Charge these dresses to one Agent Froth." I say to the girl at the register. Then I turn around right before we leave. "Good-bye Laura. Let's not do this again anytime soon."

A few minutes later, Cerys decided it was a good time to ask questions. "So who was that? And who was she talking about?" Of course I don't want to answer, so what do I do? What I do best. Change the subject.

"Hey look, a doughnut shop. You hungry?" Nailed it. Perfect transition. And of course Cerys almost started drooling at the thought of food.

Walking up to the doughnut counter and realizing that there wasn't a display was weird. Figured I'd ask the guy what they had.

"Hey, where's all the doughnuts?"

"We're all out. All we have left is this box of one dozen crazed weasels."

That was the point where Cerys really did start drooling. "Buy it. Buy it. Buy it."

Sigh. What else could I do? "Fine. We'll take that." And charge it to Froth as well. Too bad for him. "But Cerys? Don't open it until we're home and you're in your room." Last thing I need is a hyper spider chasing weasels around the house.

But it's unfortunate. On the walk home, I couldn't get the earlier conversation with Laura out of my head. Looking at Cerys did remind me of Lily. Maybe that's why I was so willing to accept her, spider parts and all. But that's not really something I want to think about. The more important thing is-

"Cerys! Hands out of the box!"

 _Author's Note: Apologies for these being relatively short. Life has a way of making it so there isn't a whole lot of time to create. My goal is to try and get a chapter out every week, if possible. But hopefully you all enjoy this so far. More to come, along with more girls, and maybe some answers._

 _Until next time, CymrianDragul signing out._


	3. That time of the year

**AN: Decided to change the layout/format of the chapters. Hopefully you guys like it. Plus, stay to the end to get a character bonus.**

I started noticing that Cerys has been being increasingly moody and sullen as this week continued on. I, being the socially inept person that I've become over the past few years, didn't know how to ask what was bothering her, short of just asking. Needless to say, it didn't go too well.

"Hey, Cerys, you seem a bit down lately." _More like 'a bit' of an understatement. Pun points for me._ "Anything you want to talk about?" Normally, that would have gotten some sort of tsundere reaction, but not this time. Instead, all I got was an 'I don't want to talk about it.' I didn't even think she knew that phrase.

"I'll be in my room," she told me as she went up the stairs. "Make sure you don't bother me anymore."

"Wait, you're not hungry? I'm making dinner right now." Her only response was a head shake and the sound of a door closing. _Cerys not being hungry? Now I know something's wrong. The question is what..._

Then I remembered something. Back when Froth dropped of Cerys, he handed me a file. _Why didn't I look in it yet? That might be important somehow._ _Now where did I put it?_ I'll admit that I'm not the most organized of people, although I have to use the term 'people' loosely considering I have an arachne living with me. But I digress. The file. Yes. Now to find it. Aha. Found it. Right where I left it. Which was in a random box full of other papers, some of which are pretty meaningless. But at least now I have the file again. Oh...

"Well, at least I can't say I forgot if I never knew to begin with. She really should have just said something." Well, I can't say that her personality isn't cute in a way. But enough about that. I have work to do and only a few days to try and get it done. Looks like I'll have to call in the big guns...

It was a hard few days, but we got it done. And by we, I mean Agent Froth and some other agents that came with him. Apparently there's plenty with a lot of free time and nothing to do. Not to mention that I had the hardest job of all. My part was keeping Cerys out of the house whenever possible, but given her mood lately, that was incredibly difficult. Normally, she loves running around the part and eating whatever I buy for her. But this time, all I got was silence broken up with the occasional brush-off. Any other time, I'd be thrilled for a few moments of peace and quiet, but considering I know why she's like this, it's hard to enjoy it. I looked at my watch. I just had to stall for another hour or so. I got a whiff of a delicious smell. Crepes, to be exact.

"Hey, Cerys. Stay right here while I go get us something to eat real quick." A nod was the only response.

The crepes were quick, but unfortunately, Cerys was quicker. In the few minutes it took me to order and pay, Cerys took off...somewhere. _Oh great. Now I have to search for her._ I asked around, but no one had seen her leave. Apparently, she was that fast. So I did what I normally do when something or someone goes missing: I start calling out. Doesn't work so well for inanimate objects, but it might work on Cerys.

"Cerys! Where are you?!" _Wow, my voice doesn't carry as far as I wish it did._ "Cerys!"

Almost as if The Man in the Sky was looking out for me, I heard a scream that resonated within me. _Oh no, Cerys..._ Crepes in the air and my feet flying over the ground, following the sound. I had the feeling I was getting closer when I heard a set of words that made my heart sink.

"You and all your kind are nothing but monsters! Go back to where you came from, beast!"

Honestly, I don't remember much after I heard that. Next thing I knew, there was some random guy on the ground at the end of an alley, Cerys was, shockingly, in tears, and I had a burning pain in my arm. To be fair, that part was pretty easily explained by the fat that there was a 3 in. blade in my left bicep. _Well, there goes my weekend._ _Luckily, I'm right handed._ I reach in my pocket and call Froth.

"Hey, Agent. Can you get to my location quickly? I got an unconscious guy that may have attempted to assault a liminal species. 2 minutes? Cool. And does anyone there know first aid?"

Cerys, on the other hand, kept worrying about me. It was a good change though.

"I can't believe you did that! Why would you do that?! You're hurt now!"

I waved her off, and once Froth and another agent showed up to collect the guy from the ground, they quickly patched me up. Apparently, I got lucky and the knife missed the important arteries. Success? Well, we started heading home, and I figured it was a good time to let Cerys know why I kept her out for so long.

"Hey, Cerys. I bet you're wondering why we've been away from the house for so long, aren't you?"

Sniffle. "Of course. We usually don't go anywhere for this long. Especially not this many places."

Finally standing at the front door. "Well, go inside and you'll see why." I opened the door and she stepped inside and let out a loud gasp. In the entrance way was a large hand-made banner reading 'Happy Birthday Cerys.'

"You...you knew my birthday? But I never told you..."

All I could do was smile at her, despite the still existing pain in my arm. "Of course I knew. What kind of host family would I be if I didn't?" _I should have looked at that file earlier, but all's well that ends well, I guess._ "So do you like it?"

She grinned widely, and I could see the happiness in all 8 of her eyes. "Of course I do!" _And she's off towards the presents. Thank the gods for online shopping._

So we had a small party. You know, cake, ice cream, presents. The basics, although basic is a strange word to use for a spiders birthday party. Cerys ripped into the presents and I watched from by the sliding glass door to the backyard when something caught my attention out of the corner of my eye. I opened the door and stepped outside. _I've never noticed that big plant there before. Where did it come from?_

That was my last thought before I heard a loud sound and everything went black.

 **Character Profile:**

 **Name: Cerys**

 **Species: Green Huntsman Spider**

 **Hometown: Gloucestershire, England**

 **Favorite Colors: Magenta, Silver, Blue**

 **Birthday: August 14**

 **Age: 22**

 **Favorite food: Anything she can eat, although she prefers "hunting"**

 **Cup size (perverts): A-cup**


	4. Special Chapter

I open my eyes and all I see is the sky through the trees. _Where am I and how did I get here?_ I sit up and push the thoughts to the back of my mind. I feel normal, or at least as normal as I can be. The only thing that's different, besides where I woke up at, are the 3 red and white orbs on my belt. _Oh well, sitting here isn't going to do me any good. Might as well start walking...in some random direction._ That's a good idea, me. Standing up, I start walking. The sun is centered in the sky, so of course I can't figure out what direction I'm going. At least the walking is good for me, and I feel great too.

I eventually stop to rest. Feels like I've walked for hours. Maybe I have. Who knows? At least the sun has gone down more. My stomach starts growling. Of course I'm hungry, considering that I can't remember the last time I ate anything. Guess I should look for something. Just then, I caught a whiff of something. Something delicious and meaty. _I smell food. Delicious food._ Needless to say, I followed my nose until I heard...

"Hey, you there!"

A voice. Female. Unknown, yet somehow familiar. "Hello? Who said that?" I called out just before a young girl stepped out from the trees. Small, green hair, and and wearing silver. Familiar...

"You look lost and hungry, stranger. I got an idea though. I'll share my lunch with you if, and only if, you can defeat me in a battle. You up for a challenge?"

A challenge? Battle? What is she talking about? "I...I don't understand. What do you mean? I'm not a fighter..."

She laughed and pointed at the weird things attached to my belt. "I'm talking about a Pokémon battle, of course. You're obviously a trainer, or else you wouldn't have Pokéballs with you. I'll even go first. Go, **Joltik**!"

 _ **Joltik, the Attaching Pokémon. They attach themselves to large-bodied Pokémon and absorb static electricity, which they store in an electric pouch.**  
_

The ball opened and a small yellow spider appeared. Apparently that's a Joltik. I reach for one of the ones I possess. Hopefully this will help me.

"Go, whatever you are!"

"Bellosom!"

 ** _Bellosom, the Flower Pokémon._ _When Bellossom gets exposed to plenty of sunlight, the leaves ringing its body begin to spin around. This Pokémon's dancing is renowned in the southern lands._**

 __Mystery girl laughed. _I really need to figure out her name._ "A Bellosom, huh? Looks like this might be fun after all. Now Joltik, use **Electroweb**!" A web of electricity flew out at Bellosom with me not really knowing what to do. Just then...

"Bellosom, counter with **Leaf Blade**!" Bellosom easlily sliced through the net and rushed close to Joltik.

"Heh, right into my trap. Joltik, use **Sucker Punch**!"

Bellosom took the blow and was sent flying. _Great, now what do I do? At least Bellosom is able to keep battling._ _I need to figure out some other moves to use..._

I look up at the sky, blocking my eyes from the bright sun. That's when it came to me, but then I heard the next attack.

"Joltik, use **Signal Beam**!"

"Bellosom, counter with **Solar Beam**!"

The two beams collided in mid-air, seemingly pushing the other for dominance. Then, a cloud of dust erupted from the meeting point. Neither attack won out against the other.

"Joltik, rush in close and use **Sucker Punch again**!"

 _Good. Now I can actually fight back._ "Bellosom, use **Leaf Storm**!" At that moment, a torrent of leaves and petals surrounded Joltik and sent it flying backwards, unable to fight any longer.

"Joltik, return. Looks like you're not a pushover. This is already fun." She pulled another ball out as I called back Bellosom. "Now, come on out, **Spinarak**!"

 _ **Spinarak, the String Spit Pokémon.**_ _ **The web spun by Spinarak can be considered its second nervous system. It is said that this Pokémon can determine what kind of prey is touching its web just by the tiny vibrations it feels through the web's strands.**_ __

Well, looks like it's my turn. "Let's go!" I shout as I though another ball. A strange looking sarcophagus with arms appears.

"Cofagrigus."

 _ **Cofagrigus, the Coffin Pokémon.**_ _ **It has been said that they swallow those who get too close and turn them into mummies. They like to eat gold nuggets.**_ __

"A Cofagrigus, huh? Looks like I'm going to have to try this time. Now, Spinarak, use **Night Shade!** "

Spinarak's eyes started to glow and Cofagrigus cried out, almost like it was scared by something.

"Cofagrigus, shake it off and use **Will-O-Wisp!** " Cofagrigus glared at Spinarak before shooting a stream of blue flames towards it faster than Spinarak could move.

"Ha, direct hit. Now Cofagrigus, let's finish this with **Psychic!** " Cofagrigus's eyes lit up before sending Spinarak through the air to land at it's trainers feet.

"Spinarak, return." She said as I recalled my current ally. "Now let's win this next one, **Ariados!"**

 _ **Ariados, the Long Leg Pokémon. Ariados's feet are tipped with tiny hooked claws that enable it to scuttle on ceilings and vertical walls. This Pokémon constricts the foe with thin and strong silk webbing.**_

 _Oh great, another spider. I wonder if there's a connection here..._ "Let's go for number three. Come on out!" Another ball in the air.

"Kecleon!"

 _ **Kecleon, the Color Swap**_ _ **Pokémon.**_ _ **Kecleon is capable of changing its body colors at will to blend in with its surroundings. There is one exception—this Pokémon can't change the zigzag pattern on its belly.**_ __

"Now, Ariados, use **Pin Missle!** "

"Kecleon, dodge it and use **Fury Swipes!** "

Ariados shot a volley of spikes at Kecleon, who narrowly dodged before swiping claws at it's spidery opponent.

"Now, Kecleon, use **Feint Attack!"** Kecleon moved in for the attack, but just then...

"Ariados, hit it with **Sucker Punch!** "

Kecleon went flying, somehow landing on it's feet. _It seems different somehow. I can't quite place it though._

"Now Ariados, use **Psychic!** " But nothing happened. "What?!"

 _I'm not going to question the confusion happening._ "Now Kecleon, finish it with **Psybeam!** "

The attack landed and Ariados was out like a light before returning to its Pokéball. _Guess I should do the same with Kecleon._ I recall my second winner as my still unnamed rival looks me over once again.

"I guess I shouldn't have judged so quickly. But this last battle will be my victory. Come on out, **Galvantula!** "

 _ **Galvantula, the EleSpider Pokémon.**_ _ **They employ an electrically charged web to trap their prey. While it is immobilized by shock, they leisurely consume it.**_ __

"Well, looks like it's my turn. Let's go, number four!"

"Mawile."

 _ **Mawile, the Deceiver**_ _ **Pokémon.**_ _ **Mawile's huge jaws are actually steel horns that have been transformed. Its docile-looking face serves to lull its foe into letting down its guard. When the foe least expects it, Mawile chomps it with its gaping jaws.**_ __

"Mawile, **Vice Grip!** "

"Galvantula, **Electroweb!** "

Mawile attempted to grab Galvantula with it's jaws, only succeeding in getting its jaws stuck together with webbing.

"I've had fun with this," the girl said. "I'm going to end this quick. Galvantula, **Electro Ball!** "

 _I have to do something quick!_ "Mawile, **Iron Defense!** " Mawile spun around, letting its second mouth take the electrical attack, barely harming it.

"Now for _my_ final attack. Mawile, use **Fire Blast!** "

"Galvantula, **Energy Ball!** "

The attacks collided in the middle for a second time before the flames burst through and hit the target, knocking out Galvantula.

"I do believe that's my win. As we agreed, I'll be helping myself to some of your lunch."

She laughed as she put her final spider back into the ball. "I guess so. You more than earned it. I haven't been defeated in a while." She waved to the food laden blanket behind her. "Have a seat. Oh, I never introduced myself, did I? My name's Cerys."

 _Cerys...Wait...I know someone with that name..._

That was my last thought before I was blinded by a bright light.


	5. Leafy greens

I opened my eyes and realized that I was no longer outside. Instead, I was on my couch and hearing voices coming from another room. Well, the voices weren't the only thing strange I noticed. I also happened to notice the bunch of leaves next to my head. Yeah, considering Cerys knocked over any plants I brought inside, I know it's not that.

"Oh, sei finalmente sveglio? Quello è buono. Ero preoccupato che ti ho fatto del male irreparabile."

 _Well, I must be going crazy. Either that, or a giant plant is speaking to me in a language that I can't understand. 50-50 chance either way, I guess._ "Come again?"

Luckily, that's when Cerys and the agents came into the room. Froth looked, and I use this lightly, amused. It was kind of strange coming from him.

"So you're awake. You probably have some questions, I'm assuming. If you do, you should start asking."

I sat up as Cerys came over and hopped onto the couch, all the while glaring with all eight eyes at the plant. _Wait, is it moving? Oh no..._

I took a breath to organize my thoughts before I asked, "Who is she?" That managed a nod from the agents before the plant moved around the couch to reveal a slightly feminine form. When I made eye contact with her, she looked away shyly.

Froth took the lead with explaining. "She's a mandrake. Her cries earlier knocked you out, although it was partially your fault considering you startled her." He looked over at the mandrake. "Why don't you introduce yourself?" She covered her face with her leaves and mumbled quietly.

 _Wow, shyer than a kraken girl's nipple, this one._ "Umm, any chance you could speak up some?"

She moved the leaves so I could see her face better. _Wow, her eyes are gorgeous. Almost like a grassy field on a sunny day._ "Il mio nome è Ortensia Abelie Fiore."

I looked over at Froth. "I have absolutely no idea what she just said. Want to fill me in?"

"She told you her name. Anyone would have known that." Froth stated.

 _I'd know that if I knew what language that was..._ "So, want to tell me what language that is, or do I have to guess that too?" _Mildly passive-aggressive, but he deserves it._

Froth headed for the front door. "I'll leave that up to you to figure out. Have fun." With that, all the agents were gone.

All I could do was sigh. Not only was I given care of another girl, this one doesn't speak English. "So, you said your name was 'Ortensia,' right?" I gave a thumbs up to help her understand the question, and she nodded.

Cerys looked at me. "We need to teach her English, don't we? Well, I'm going to watch TV. Oh, and one of the agents brought the mail in. There's some kind of fancy envelope for you." She turned on the television, and the noise grabbed Ortensia's attention.

"C'è la televisione qui. Quale programma è questo?" She asked Cerys as she moved in front of the couch.

"I have no idea what you just said, Leafy. So just be quiet for now and let me watch my show, understand?" No response, as if she expected anything.

 _A fancy envelope?_ I grabbed the mail from the table. _What could it be?_ Just then, I recognized the handwritten address on the front. "What could she be sending me? And why would she send it to me to begin with?" I opened the envelope and removed the contents. _Why? Why this? Why me?_ I crumpled the paper in my fist. She should have known what my answer would have been before she sent it. _Hopefully, she doesn't show up looking for me for not answering. That's a confrontation that I don't need right now..._

 _ **AN: Sorry for the shorter/extremely late chapter. Life as a way of intruding when you least expect it. I'll hopefully be a bit quicker with the next ones. Also, Ortensia's profile will be coming up soon as well, so stay tuned. Same monster time. Same monster channel. -CymrianDragul**_


	6. The Devil Is In The Details

While the girls were watching t.v., I opened the door to the attic. Wow, I haven't been up here since I moved in. Climbing up the latter and closing the door behind me, I moved towards a small trunk hidden away in the back. The memories are all in here. Hard to believe it's been six years. Opening the trunk, I reached in and took out some of the pictures. I can never forget…

Cerys looked around the room, only seeing Ortensia sitting on the floor by the couch watching television.

"Hey, where'd Chris go? He was just here…"

Ortensia looked up at Cerys. "Che cosa dici? Non capisco."

Cerys sighed. "We really need to teach you how to speak English. No one understands a word you're saying." She grabbed the remote and changed the channel. "Finally, these 'educational' shows are going to come in handy."

"I can't watch anymore of these ridiculous shows. It's been three hours." Cerys moaned. "Have you learned anything yet?"

Ortensia looked at the miniature spider. "Credo di aver finalmente capito un po '. Fammi provare questo ..." She took a breath. "How…is…this?"

All eight of Cerys' eyes looked shocked. "You already learned that much from watching tv?" She looked at the screen again. "I was told that this thing rots your mind…"

Io ancora non comprendere appieno, ma lei sembra felice. "So…I do good?" Ortensia hid her face behind her leaves when she asked.

"Yeah, you did –" A knock on the door cut Cerys off mid-sentence. "Someone's here? We weren't expecting anyone today." She got up and headed for the door. "Besides, after that mysterious envelope that we weren't allowed to see, I doubt there'll be another one…" She opened the door and stared.

Standing at the door was a purple skinned devil, his turquoise hair parted on the sides by curling black horns, and he was holding a folder behind him with his tail.

"Gabh mo leisceal. You must be Cerys, right?" he asked in a soft Irish brogue. Grabbing the folder and opening it up without waiting for an answer, he read out. "Cerys, species: arachne. That would be you. Is your host home, by any chance?"

Cerys finally collected herself enough to answer. "He's up in the attic, but who exactly are you…and why are you at our door?" I really don't like unexpected visitors…

"Ó, áit a bhfuil mo manners. My name is Cymrian, but you can call me Cym for short." He held up a badge. "I work under Agent Froth. Technically, I'm the only current member of the Monster Ops and Neutralization squad, or MON for short." He put the badge away and handed Cerys a card. "I'm the one to call if things start to get…weird." Cambrian looked past her and into the house. "So any chance of me being invited in?"

Cerys looked at him again. "I guess so. Just know that we can defend ourselves if threatened." She stepped out of the way so Cymrian could enter the house. "Sia! We have company!"

Ortensia stepped around the corner and gasped seeing a stranger. She hid behind her leaves and muttered, "Perché c'è una nuova qui? Non so se riesco a gestire questa pressione."

Without even looking twice at her, Cymrian stated, "Name: Ortensia. Species: mandragora. For your safety, I won't indulge the rest of your information." He ended with a slight bow towards her. "Anyways, where's your host family? I have something to talk to him about."

Cerys gestured towards the attic. "Last I saw, he went up to the attic, perygl dieithriaid." Suddenly, the attic door opened and the latter came down.

"What's going on down here?" I looked and noticed someone new standing near Cerys. "Who are you? I don't recall ever seeing you before." He looks like some kind of devil subspecies.

He nodded his head. "Beannachtaí. You must be Chris. You can call me Cym. I'm an 'agent,'" he air quoted, holding his folder with his tail. "I was sent here to deliver something to you from Froth." Grabbing his folder with his hands, he pulled out a small envelope. "Here. This is for you."

"What's this?" I asked, taking the envelope and opening it.

"Passes to the new museum opening this weekend. It's apparently going to have a big event about liminal history. Froth suggested you three might enjoy it. His words were, and I quote, 'There will be surprises galore.' Not sure what he meant, but there you go. With that, I'm done here." He nodded his head at me. "Chris." Turning to the girls, "Cerys." He then bowed towards Ortensia. "My lady." Out the door he went.

Both Cerys and I worded our thoughts. "That was weird." I looked at Ortensia. "Why did he bow and refer to you as a lady? Oh wait, you don't speak…"

"I do not know. It was strange." She said plainly, not looking at me.

"Wait. You learned English? When?"

Cerys shrugged. "We had a few free hours. But museum passes, huh? It'll be nice to go out again."

A/N: Hey, I'm still alive. Surprises galore. Sorry for an incredible delay on this. Between relationship issues and my laptop dying and erasing all my progress, this chapter had to be written a few times. On the bright side, New character and more advancement towards the plot. Expect more sporadic updates, but know that it's not over yet. Now, on to what you've been waiting for: the character profiles. – CymrianDragul

Name: Ortensia Abelie Fiore (Sia)

Species: Mandrake

Hometown: Specifics unknown. Located in southern Italy.

Favorite t.v. show: SpongeBob SquarePants

Age: 18 (in human years)

Name: Cymrian (Cym)

Species: Devil

Hometown: Unknown

Age: Unknown. (Claims 28 in human years.)

Catchphrase: "Don't worry about it. It's fine."


	7. First Group Outing

Normally, I'd consider a museum trip to be boring, or something middle school kids would have for a field trip. The only difference is that teachers only have a group of school kids to handle. I, on the other hand, have Cerys and Ortensia. At least Cerys has gone places with me before, so I have at least some idea how to get her to behave. Hunger is apparently a good motivator. This is Ortensia's first outing though. Combine that with her lack of talking, at least to me, combined with her only being around for a day, it could mean trouble for everyone. Especially me. This isn't going to end well. I can feel it…

The museum looked like any other from the outside. However, any other observations had to wait since Cerys was on my back chattering in my ear and I had to keep Ortensia from getting lost among the crowd gathering around.

"Look at them!" "The small one is so cute!" "Look at the chest on that plant!" Between the crowd's excitement and picture taking, I was surprised we made it inside before the museum closed.

"We made it." I panted, after having to navigate the sea of humans. "It's too bad we only have a few minutes to look around."

Cerys stopped talking and looked at me in shock. "Wait, what? What do you mean 'only a few minutes'? I thought we'd have all day!"

I put her down next to Ortensia, who still won't look me in the eye. "I didn't expect such a crowd. Everyone wanted pictures of the two of you, and you posing for them didn't exactly help."

"Well, it's not my fault that other people have realized my cuteness." She stated, once again striking a pose for an imaginary camera. I heard Ortensia say something softly. I barely understood her.

"It's o.k., Ortensia. You're plenty cute too." All I got in response was a blush, but at least it was something, right?

It was then that I heard someone call out to us.

"Ah, you must be the special guests we were told to expect. Welcome to our newly opened museum. I'm the Curator."

I looked at the Curator, who was a grizzled older man who had a gentlemanly aura to him. "Umm…I don't know what you mean by 'special guests.' We were just given these passes-"

"Ah, yes. The exclusive 'Night Lock-in' passes." He stated, smiling. "Very many people wanted to experience our displays after hours. You three are the lucky first guests."

Ok, the longer he smiles at us, the creepier he starts to seem… "What's the point of locking the people in? That doesn't seem like the best idea."

Cerys tugged on the leg of my jeans, impatiently. "Who cares? The point is we have all night to look at everything. I wonder if there's an arachne exhibit."

I sighed. Cerys seemed way too excited about this. Ortensia just looks kind of scared, but that's not our of the ordinary. I handed the Curator the passes, although something didn't feel right about this whole situation.

"Wonderful. I'll get these filed away real quickly. Once again, welcome to the museum and enjoy your night." With that, he was gone. I didn't even see him leave. Weird…

I looked over at the girls who were chatting away, and by that, I mean Cerys was talking while Ortensia just nodded at what she said. "Well, I guess we're here all night, so we should get this tour started, right?"

 _ **Sorry for the short, late chapter. Writer's block is a wicked mistress. On a more pleasant note, this is part one of an extended chapter arc. Look forward to whenever I get that out (hopefully in less than a month.)**_

 _ **CymrianDragul**_


	8. Knight at the Museum

"This museum is pretty standard so far." I say it as less of a fact and more as a general observation. "It's just like every other museum I've been in."

Cerys looked at me from my side. "When was the last time you've been in museum?"

"Well, last time…" I trailed off as memories sealed away came flooding back.

 _Holding the hand of a young girl, her curly brown hair bouncing as she looks around at the exhibits, her eyes alight with wonder and excitement._

 _"Look over there! Dinosaurs!"_

 _I laughed. "You really love dinosaurs, don't you?"_

 _She nods, smiling, and tugs on my hand, gesturing that she wanted up on my shoulders. "Do you think any of them were like me?"_

 _My head shakes. "I don't think so. You're one of a kind."_

"Oi!" Cerys' voice brought me back to the present. For a second, it almost seemed like their faces were the same. Only she had a different color in her eyes…

"Sorry, girls. Last time I was at a museum was a long time ago. It's good to know nothing really changed."

Just then, there was a sound similar to coconut shells clacking. I turned to look down one of the side exhibits to see a security guard. At least, not an average security guard.

Γειά σου! My name is Damaris. I'm the night guard for tonight, so if you need anything, let me know."

Ortensia just his behind me while Cerys looked in awe. "You're a centaur…I've never met one before."

I cover Cerys' amazement with a question of my own. "I don't recognize your accent. Where are you from, if you don't mind me asking." Politeness usually works in situations like this. At least, it does with other humans. I haven't met a centaur before either. Not surprising though.

The guard, Damaris she said, smiled. "I'd be surprised if you did. I'm Greek. The Interspecies Exchange allowed me to come over here, and even helped me find a position to earn money."

Suddenly, and without warning, the power cut out, immersing all of us in utter darkness.

Just as quickly as they vanished, the lights popped back to life. Nothing looked any different. The exhibits and displays were all in pristine condition, obviously taken care of. Although I feel like George Washington moved some. Maybe it's just a trick of the lights. That's when the silence struck me.

"Cerys?" I realized she was gone. Ortensia as well. "Cerys! Ortensia!" I called out with high hopes and low threshold for disappointment.

Damaris slowly stepped towards me, her hooves clacking softly against the polished marble of the museum floor. "Μην ανησυχείτε." I looked up at her. "In English, it means don't worry. We'll find them soon." She looked at the figure of the first president, her expression dubious, her hands acting as if they would be better off wielding a weapon instead of a flashlight. "First thing is we should make sure we're safe. There are many stories of danger at night. Rumors from the other guards about exhibits coming to life. Even one involving a violent murder."

"Wait, murder?" is what I wanted to say, but all I got out was "Wai-" before Damaris roughly grabbed me by the collar and started running towards where she stated that, over my shouts of horror of flying backwards and the sound of hooves slamming against marble, the security office was. Unfortunately, other forces were conspiring against us reaching our goal. As we approached the office, the lights flickered and I spotted a figure I recognized from high school history classes.

"Alexander Hamilton?" I asked, shock apparent in my voice. Damaris stopped and looked at me, a quizzical expression on her face. She's actually pretty cute when she's confused. "He's the guy on the $10 bill." I was racking my brain trying to remember more, cursing myself for not paying attention to the musical when I heard a loud bang and was sharply yanked into the office.

"καλή θλίψη, μπορείτε Αμερικανούς. At least we're safe now." Damaris walked over to what looked to be monitors showing security camera footage. "We can hide here until the morning."

"I can't stay in here! The girls are out there, along with apparently homicidal historical figures!"

"Going out there is a risk to your life, and I may only be a guard, but in my chest," My eyes glance over her 'ample assets,' "beats the heart of the noble knights that were my ancestors." She pulled two short swords from next to the desk. _Please tell me those aren't real._ "If you still insist on facing these dangers, then allow me to accompany you for the night."

It was just then that my attention was caught by a flash of movement out of the corner of my eye. I turned to look at the screens and realized the movement was… "The girls!" I looked at the control panel, hoping for some way to communicate with them. My hopes were met when I found a microphone. I talked Damaris into helping me turn it on, then I sent out my message.

"Cerys, Ortensia, I'm coming for you."


	9. Insert clever title here

The plan, or lack of, was set. We were going to avoid the possible killer exhibits if possible. If not, we'd find out how good Damaris' sword skills are. _We might be in trouble, but the girls need me._ I turned to my four-hooved guardian. "Open the door and let's get going."

Damaris gripped a sword and nodded, turning the handle, letting the door open freely, revealing the not empty hallway. However, instead of a former president, in front of the door was…

"Who is that?" I asked, spotting the new arrival. Looking at the figure, it resembled a female suited in armor. The armor itself looked heavy, but she carried it on her body as if it were feather light. "I thought we were the only ones here tonight."

Damaris looked at me, obviously puzzled by my statement. "δεν είμαι σίγουρος τι εννοείς. There is only a suit of armor." She looked at it a bit closer. "Although, this particular armor is from the exhibit of England under the rule of King Arthur. It's said that this was his armor."

"Wait, so you're telling me you don't see the…" I question, pointing.

"The what?"

 _Well, she must assume I'm crazy now._ "Nothing. Maybe I'm just tired and seeing things. Or maybe I'm too stressed out at out our current situation."

"That tends to happen to humans in difficult situations, I'm told."

I shake my head, trying to organize my thoughts. "I'm fine now. I was just seeing things. Let's go rescue the girls from whatever they're running from." _Hopefully, my hallucinations don't get worse._

You know what's creepy? Wandering through an exhibit about early pioneers where random sounds are tied to motion sensors. With a centaur who's large enough to trigger them all. I'm the middle of the night. _At least my grave won't say I died from dysentery._ Just then, I hear recorded child laughter. _Wait, we're past that spot, aren't we?_

"Damaris, was that from you?"

She shook her head. "Neigh, 'twas not me."

I hear it again. "Seriously, stop horsing around." (Heh, horse jokes)

It was then that we realized that the noises were getting louder, meaning…

"We're not alone here."

A lone pair of eyes watches the duo from afar. The time for revealing the bearer not yet arrived. Patience necessary for goal. Duo aware of presence due to technology. Figure slowly fades into shadow.

We stood still so long that the lights around us shut off from lack of movement. As did all the lights behind us.

Damaris was the first to speak. "I believe whoever, or whatever, was there is gone now. Either that, or motionless."

I moved from her side, causing the lights to resume illuminating the area around us. "Let's be optimistic for now and say it's gone. The last thing I need right now are more distractions." Turning around, I spot something familiar out of the corner of my eye. "Umm…Damaris? Why is that here?" It might have been the waiver in my voice when I said her name, but she turned and followed my pointing finger towards…

"αυτό είναι αδύνατη!" Shock evident in her face and in her posture, one hand the sword at her hip. "That's impossible! That should have been by the guard office!" Her frightened words echoing through the empty exhibit as we stare at the same armor from before. Well, minus the girl. _Small miracles, I guess._

"How did it get here?" I wonder aloud, finally getting the chance to examine it closely. "It looks like a plain suit of armor." I touch it carefully, almost like it was rigged to explode upon contact. "Feels normal too." Of course, as the words leave my mouth, the armor starts to warm under my hand and I spot a set of almost transparent eyes peering at me through the helmet visor.

I'd like to pretend my scream was less high pitched than it was when I yanked my hand away and leapt back from the metal figure, but I'm pretty sure some dogs a few miles away heard it and started barking. Damaris could barely hold back a snicker as she patted me on the shoulder.

"There, there. It's okay. The scary armor won't hurt you." She said, almost condescending. All I could do was glare embarrassed in her direction before walking towards where we saw the girls on the security cameras, the sound of hooves following close behind me.

A pair of eyes watches the pair walk away before warily looking at the suspiciously out of place armor. Then a voice begins speaking, as if holding one side of a conversation.

"I've located one of the two you requested, but something's wrong." A pause. "I don't believe we've been told all of the details." A longer pause. "No, but something's not quite right about him. I'll report back when something happens." Quiet once again covers the halls, only broken by the slight clink of metal moving.

I looked around at the statues and models as we passed, Damaris explaining some of the more important ones. It had been quiet for a period of time. _Almost too quiet…_

"Watch out!" I hear as I'm pushed to the ground, narrowly avoiding an axe aimed for where my head was a moment before. I turn to see the handle still in the hands of George Washington. _Great, almost killed by the first president._ As he swung the axe again, I ducked. The sound of clashing metal got my attention.

"Damaris!"

She held back the dead man's weapon with her sword, and appeared to be struggling. "Just go! Find the girls! I'll hold this one back!" She yelled back towards me. I didn't need to be told twice. _Sorry, Damaris._ I ran down into the darkness of the unknown.

Next thing I knew, I was in the scientific age of history. _Wow, this museum has no sense of linear time._ Before I could have any other thoughts criticizing the building, the lights flickered again. "What now?" I ponder aloud. Which wasn't my best idea, as it made me a target for the bolt of visible electricity that raced past me. Turning around to see what new danger I was facing, my face paled.

Standing a few feet away was the model of Nikola Tesla. Who was surrounded by the same lightning that almost hit me. _Great, Telsa's a wizard now. Only one thing to do._

I ran.

 _ **AN: Sorry for the wait. I have so much I want to do, but it's all coming along finally. This chapter was longer than the last ones, so that's at least a reason for it to be slightly late.**_

 _ **Anyway, enjoy.**_


	10. Wrapping Up The Night

Some say that cowardice is what helps us survive, that running away from danger is how we live to breed the next generation. Let's just say, when you risk electrocution, fighting back isn't exactly the first thing you think to do. Fight or flight, and believe me, I could have been confused for a land harpy with how fast I was going. Unfortunately, running along by myself wasn't the best idea considering I didn't know the museum layout.

Fun fact: all the wings have exit doors in case of emergency.

Fun fact 2: at night, all the doors are locked.

I found that out the hard way. Needless to say, I ended up between a metaphorical rock and a hard place. Behind me, a locked door. In front of me, certain soon. _Well, I've lived a good life. Not long, but good. Or at least somewhat decent._

I take one final look at the deadly figure coming towards me before closing my eyes, preparing for the inevitable bolt of electricity building up in power. Behind my closed eyelids, I can see the light growing brighter before I feel a warmth envelop me. A few seconds pass before I realize my mortality is still intact. _I'm still alive? How?_

Opening my eyes, I see… _bars? No, it's some kind of visor._

" _ **Do not worry, my master. I am here to protect you."**_

 _Ok, a voice in my head. Now I know Damaris was right. I am crazy._

" _ **If I may assume, Damaris was the steed with you. Is that correct, master?"**_

I looked out through the metal grating of the faceplate to see Tesla charging another strike. Only this time, when I tried to move out of the death zone, I surprised myself by ending up behind him in moments. An opening was right in front of me, and by the gods, I was going to take it.

Clenching my fist, I drove a punch into his back with all my strength behind it, going straight though leaving nothing but a waxy hole and some severed wires where the midsection of his torso used to exist. Tesla fell to the marble floor, motionless. I looked at my hand, observing the wax coated metal gauntlet where skin should be. _Gauntlet. Visor. So far, evidence suggests I'm wearing armor. Pretty sure I'd remember suiting up though._

" _ **Master, may I suggest that we find your allies? I can sense your worry."**_

 _Fine, but you need to explain yourself, mysterious voice in my head._ I start running back to where I left Damaris while the voice explains.

" _ **You may call me Gwendolyn. That was the name my first master gave me. I have been following you this night, waiting for you to require my services."**_

 _Ok, so you can obviously hear my thoughts. Cool. As for following me, I haven't seen anyone except Damaris and…wait…_ That's when it occurred to me. _You're that girl in the armor!_

" _ **Correct, master."**_

 _Wait, so your first master…was King Arthur?!_

" _ **Correct again. He released me before his death to find another master. I have waited centuries for you to come along."**_

 _So if you're in the armor, and I'm in the armor, how are you in my head._ I pause, hearing hooves on marble. _Also, how did we get back so fast? You know what? Never mind. Let's kill the first president._

Seeing Damaris struggle, exhausted, against a tireless robot is what have me the idea. I grabbed her and used her body like a springboard to launch myself over and at Washington's head. I was rewarded with the squish of wax, the spark of electricity, and a squeal of shock and embarrassment from the female centaur from metal hands grabbing too close to her tail end. Before she could say anything about where I touched, I interrupted.

"You can express your embarrassment and anger later. We have to go. Now."

I take off running, Damaris close beside me. Have to admit, keeping pace with a centaur is a new experience for me.

"Any chance you know where the κορίτσια are?"

"The what now?"

Simultaneously, I received two responses.

"The girls."

" _ **The girls."**_

 _Oh._ "Not really, but I have a bond with Cerys that'll lead me to her. I can feel it."

" _ **Master, not to criticize, but that's stupid."**_

My witty retort was cut short by Damaris' question.

"I must ask. Where did you find that armor? It looks similar to the one we saw earlier."

I chuckle sheepishly, unsure how to answer. "Well, it's…kind of the same one." I feel a tug deep in my core. "Cerys!" I turn down a seemingly random hall finding myself in the Egyptian section.

Cerys and Ortensia sat a few feet away from me, speaking and laughing with someone just out of sight. They heard the sound of my footsteps as well as Damaris' hooves and looked over, their eyes widening at the sight of an armored figure approaching them.

"Who are you? Are you the ghost from earlier?" Fear tinged Cerys' voice as she tried to put on a brave face for the cowering Ortensia hiding behind her. From the side, where the girls were previously conversing, came a bandaged wrapped figure.

"You shall not harm them. I command you, foul armored spirit."

 _Gwendolyn, could you release me for now? They need to know it's me._

" _ **As you wish, master."**_

I blink rapidly as the slight chill of the air conditioned exhibit hits my skin, causing a shiver to run down my body.

"Chris!" Cerys yelled as she ran towards me, fear quickly melting away to excitement. "Where have you been?!"

Catching her as she leapt onto me, and beckoning towards Ortensia, I released the stress and worry I was carrying the whole night. "I've been looking for the two of you. I was worried all night." _I figure I'll keep the murderous 'robots' to myself for now._

Ortensia looked at me, and to my surprise, asked a simple question. "You were worried?"

Nodding, I touched one of her leaves gently. "Of course. You two are my family. Why wouldn't I worry about you?" Looking up, I ask. "So who's your friend?"

Cerys gasped. "Oh, I almost forgot!" She hopped back down to the floor and over to the new...human...? "This is our new friend, Sadeh. She's a princess."

"Ah, so you must be the male these young ones were telling me about. It is as she stated, my name is Sadeh, and as you can see, I am a mummy." She waved an arm, some of the bandages starting to come loose.

"It's a pleasure to meet you. Anyway, Cerys, I saw you both on camera running away from something. What was it?"

"Oh! That's right! We were going to tell you. We saw a body that was missing a head!" Cerys' excitement slightly comical compared to Ortensia's obvious fear at the thought of what they saw. "We ran away because the body got up and started chasing us. So we ran in here and met Sadeh."

"A...headless body?" Needless to say, I was confused by that. Looking at Damaris, I see her expression mirroring mine.

"Let me explain this." From the shadows, Cym steps out with another being behind him. "What, or should I say who, they saw was this one," he states, gesturing to the person behind him. "This is Siodhachan. He's a dullahan, thus the reason they saw him headless. It's unfortunate, but his body has narcolepsy when it's separated from his head." Pulling out a file seemingly out of nowhere- _How does he do that?_ -he pulled a sheet with a card attached. "Before I forget, this is for you."

I take the paper and look it over. "Wait, this says..."

"Yep. Sadeh is coming to live with you now. The papers are all filed." He shrugged. "Froth thought it was a good idea, at least." Looking warily at the armor, he sighed. "That armor, on the other hand, has to stay here until we get the forms through."

I nod, and turn to Sadeh. "Looks like you're part of the family now. Sorry about not being able to bring you home too, Gwendolyn." No response, but I didn't really expect one. "Let's get out of here. I'm ready to go home and relax." An assortment of agreements echoed through the room as we headed back towards the entrance.

Cymrian gestured for Siodhachan to stand next to Damaris. "Now that they're gone, I'm to propose something to the two of you." Another file appeared in his hands. "My boss is assembling a team..."

 **Hey, it's the end of this arc. Finally. But enough of that, it's time once again for more character profiles. See ya next chapter.**

 **-CymrianDragul**

 **Name: Damaris  
Race: Centaur  
Home: Rome, Greece  
Age: It's rude to ask  
Cup size: I asked, she got mad.  
Occupation: Security Guard**

 **Name: Sadeh  
Race: Mummy  
Home: Egypt (That's all she said)  
Age: She glared for asking  
Cup size: D  
Occupation: Princess**

 **Name: Gwendolyn  
Race: Living Armor  
Home: England  
Age: Old enough  
Cup size: A  
Occupation: Current museum exhibit**


End file.
